God, it's the end of
another day and I am so tired. I received photos of my
wedding day this morning that I have never seen
before. I cried so many tears as I looked at them. Just
when I think I am recovering from so much sadness and
grief on this journey, a setback comes and more tears
are shed.
I still cry when I go to
bed. My mind thinks so much about my life without Linda.
The pain goes so deep and I know someday I won't
cry so many tears, which flow so easily. If people only
knew how much it hurts to lose someone. My love for
Linda is why it is so hard to let go. My whole life was
taking care of the one you gave to me.
I tire so easily. The day
Linda died, so much of myself died with her. Healing is
so difficult, but all I know is that you are the only
true strength I have in order to get through this
personal hell. If you weren't in my life, what would be
the use.
You are the one who truly
understands my grief and pain. You created love and you
see so many people everyday who grieve for the loss of a
loved one. You know how much I loved Linda. I thank you
that I can tell others about her. She is why I now write
poetry. She simply was the most beautiful flower you
could have ever given to me. Thank you for the
flowers you have created for the memorial garden I am
building in Linda's honor.
How can the void I feel be
replaced? How long must I feel a loneliness that few
understand? I tell you daily how it feels, and I know I
will someday understand how you have been working in my
life, but sometimes you seem so far away.
Thank you God, for being so
patient. Please don't give up on me. I know I sometimes
feel lost, but only you can help me to stay the
course. I know someday I will see Linda again, but would
you please help me to heal soon. The crying is making me
so tired and I am weary of so many tears.
