Hello Sweetheart:

 

There is something about writing to you that helps more than poetry. There is a bond formed by words written directly to you.

 

So many husbands and wives are able to be with one another this morning, but I can only look back and remember the times we had together. So many mornings I would see you lying next to me, but for the past month, I have only been able to reflect back on the days, weeks and months when we could plan our time together.

 

I am trying so hard to understand why you are no longer with me. An enemy came to our door and took you. An ominous figure called cancer raped us of all dignity. I did my best to hold on to you as long as I could, but I soon realized the inevitable was going to happen.

 

I want to share with you something I thought of this morning. I actually pictured this in my mind when my eyes were shut. You know how much I love ballroom dancing. It is not something many people like because of the type of society we live in. It is a form of dancing from a bygone era that is only shown in movies such as Gone With The Wind.

 

You were brought to the ballroom in a white carriage after returning from a long trip. You were dressed in a pink gown with a white shawl around your neck. I arranged to have a red carpet rolled out in honor of you. This special place was only available for you and I. Trumpet players were on each side of the carpet saluting your return. I was dressed in a tuxedo and waited anxiously at the other end of the carpet. When you entered, you were perfectly healthy and absolutely beautiful. We both stood still and just looked at one another. I slowly walked toward you and reached out my hand. You placed your left hand in mine as I escorted you to a room larger than any we have ever seen. A 30 piece orchestra played a Strauss waltz. I couldn’t take my eyes away from you.

 

Linda, this is the first time I have been able to think of you as healthy. This is my way of picturing you as the woman I want to remember in my mind. So many days have been filled with pictures of you suffering and your resulting death. For at least a moment, I have been able to picture you as a beautiful queen frozen in time.

 

Yes, I danced with you today and it was beautiful. I love you, and always will. I look forward to the day when we will have many dances together. The orchestra is waiting and I look forward to a time when we can spend eternity with one another.